Can spiritual women also be sexually satisfied? It’s a sad question to have to ask, but the incomplete manner in which the Church has answered sexual questions does mandate that we discuss it.
If you’re one of my more modest followers, please don’t be disappointed but this article isn’t for you. However, if you’re a spiritual woman trying desperately to make sense of sexual desires and often finding answers outside of the Church, read on! I don’t want you to find yourself falling for counterfeits in the quest. A lot of women have. (And you could win a free book that will help if you keep reading.)
The sales of the Fifty Shades of Grey series has sold over 100,000,000 and the series has had a seat on the New York Times Best-seller list for 100 weeks straight. Now it will be a blockbuster in the movie theaters with Fandago presales setting records already. Let me be honest: the book has revived the sexual appetites of many women. But is that good?
I’d like to suggest that it’s not so great and that the best way to a vibrant sex life might just to become an “official church lady!”
I’m looking for some parents who want to talk about sex with their kids. A majority of parents are afraid to talk about it. I just completed focus groups in 11 cities and was blown away by how often mothers said something like, “If I don’t talk to her about _________, she won’t struggle with temptation.” This is a great lie. So, I pushed a little harder on this to see just how far mothers were going to “protect” their children. It’s wise to talk to your child about sex by the age of 9, so we asked moms of 9-12 year olds how many had talked about it. Only 50% had. When asked why they said things like, “She hasn’t asked yet.” Or “It hasn’t come up.” Moms are expecting daughters and sons to drive the conversation on critical areas of truth concerning sexuality. That’s one of the most dangerous ideas I’ve ever heard. Here’s some motivation to drive the conversation about sex in your home.
Earlier this week, I opened my blog to moderate comments on a blog titled “Was Mary A Virgin?” Suddenly, I was being accused of “slut-shaming” for using the word virgin. What!? It was the VIRGIN Mary who I was writing about! The comments—including “This is slut shaming… Wrapped up in a pretty package” and “Such dialogue and scrutiny over a woman’s virginity (aka ‘purity’) only feeds into patriarchal-based slut shaming”—were just the crest of a wave of frustration I’ve heard all year long as those following me lament that the language of sexual purity is out of style. The big claim? The word purity has no efficacy. So, let’s put it on trial today and see where we land because as a leader in the Christian sexual theology conversation, I want to know: do you think we should stop using the word purity? But here’s the deal. The debate—which I expect may get heated— must lean first and foremost on the truth of sexuality as defined in the Bible, not the opinions of men and woman. What’s a good day in court without an opening argument? Here’s my three defenses of the word purity.
“We can determine with certainty that the virgin Mary was, in fact, not a virgin,” wrote one self-declared atheist. His was one of many blog posts and articles I found debunking the “myth” of Mary’s miraculous conception. Admittedly, some of the articles I read on this topic were written by respected religious scholars… even those published in Pulitzer Prize winning journals. A Christian pursuing an intelligent faith simply must stop to consider how incredibly ludicrous it is to believe that Jesus was born of a virgin. Yes, I said “ludicrous!” Fact: it’s not scientifically possible for a virgin to give birth. If the hair on the back of your neck is standing on end, relax. I’m going to offer you some intelligent faith-food to defend Mary’s virtue. Here are two fallacies unbelievers and even believers are embracing as evidence that Mary was not a virgin, and the logic to debunk them.
“There are probably more vicious white supremacists all over America today than there were in 1968 when Martin Luther King, Jr. was killed in Memphis, Tennessee.” I read that sentence one month before Michael Brown was shot in Ferguson, and it ignited something in my spirit so passionate that my pen became a sword in my hand as I scribbled words of war in the very pages where I found it. I don’t know who wrote more words on that page: John Piper (whose book I was reading) or myself. I only know that since July my spirit has been awakened to address the racial division in my world, but I’m afraid.
Our nation is ablaze.
The combustible matter of hearts wounded by racism has been kindled into fury. What could I possibly have to contribute? Here’s what I have to say: racism is a strike at the the heart of God’s intention for marriage.