globehandsMy Facebook, Twitter and blog comments were recently riddled with reference to “the missionary position.” The sarcastic comments suggest that the reason I’ve spoken out against erotica is because I’m incapable of having a creative sex life…being a Christian woman and all. These seem to be prompted by an article entitled “Evangelicals Offer to “Trade Your Shades” for “Christian Perspective” Intimacy Book which People Magazine published about the book, Pulling Back The Shades, which  I co-authored with Dr. Juli Slattery.

Thanks, to writer Mariah Haas and People, for being fair and sticking to the facts and not name-calling. But since that’s what some have stooped to, let’s go there.

I just happen to be out of the country on a missions trip of sorts right now. That makes me a missionary at the moment. So, let me give you a missionary’s position on sex. Here are three things you need to know about sex from my point of view.

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Fifty-Shades-of-Grey-1-Office-Window“Mr. Grey will see you now,” touts the posters and trailers leading up to what promises to be a block buster movie. I probably don’t need to tell you the name (unless you’ve been living under a rock).

Maybe you’ve already decided you will not see it. But maybe you stopped by my blog post today because you are wondering. Let me tell you how I made my decision.

I was introduced to this conversation by my husband. (Relax. It’s not like that!) He’d been hearing about it in the media buzz. One night he couldn’t take it anymore, and the conversation we had changed the way I responded to this whole tidal wave of erotica.

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Can spiritual women also be sexually satisfied? It’s a sad question to have to ask, but the incomplete manner in which the Church has answered sexual questions does mandate that we discuss it.

If you’re one of my more modest followers, please don’t be disappointed but this article isn’t for you. However, if you’re a spiritual woman trying desperately to make sense of sexual desires and often finding answers outside of the Church, read on! I don’t want you to find yourself falling for counterfeits in the quest. A lot of women have. (And you could win a free book that will help if you keep reading.)

The sales of the Fifty Shades of Grey series has sold over 100,000,000 and the series has had a seat on the New York Times Best-seller list for 100 weeks straight. Now it will be a blockbuster in the movie theaters with Fandago presales setting records already. Let me be honest: the book has revived the sexual appetites of many women. But is that good?

I’d like to suggest that it’s not so great and that the best way to a vibrant sex life might just to become an “official church lady!”

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White_rose_Earlier this week, I opened my blog to moderate comments on a blog titled “Was Mary A Virgin?” Suddenly, I was being accused of “slut-shaming” for using the word virgin. What!? It was the VIRGIN Mary who I was writing about! The comments—including “This is slut shaming… Wrapped up in a pretty package” and “Such dialogue and scrutiny over a woman’s virginity (aka ‘purity’) only feeds into patriarchal-based slut shaming”—were just the crest of a wave of frustration I’ve heard all year long as those following me lament that the language of sexual purity is out of style. The big claim? The word purity has no efficacy. So, let’s put it on trial today and see where we land because as a leader in the Christian sexual theology conversation, I want to know: do you think we should stop using the word purity? But here’s the deal. The debate—which I expect may get heated— must lean first and foremost on the truth of sexuality as defined in the Bible, not the opinions of men and woman. What’s a good day in court without an opening argument? Here’s my three defenses of the word purity.

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Was Mary A Virgin? [VIDEO]


“We can determine with certainty that the virgin Mary was, in fact, not a virgin,” wrote one self-declared atheist. His was one of many blog posts and articles I found debunking the “myth” of Mary’s miraculous conception. Admittedly, some of the articles I read on this topic were written by respected religious scholars… even those published in Pulitzer Prize winning journals. A Christian pursuing an intelligent faith simply must stop to consider how incredibly ludicrous it is to believe that Jesus was born of a virgin. Yes, I said “ludicrous!” Fact: it’s not scientifically possible for a virgin to give birth.  If the hair on the back of your neck is standing on end, relax. I’m going to offer you some intelligent faith-food to defend Mary’s virtue. Here are two fallacies unbelievers and even believers are embracing as evidence that Mary was not a virgin, and the logic to debunk them.

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