Should You Get Married?

One recent issue of Glamour magazine dubbed single women who prefer freedom over family as “freemales.” Cameron Diaz was touted as a role model for all women. She was quoted, “I love being by myself and I’m really good at it.”

Now, the church would never say that we’ve bought into a feminist perspective, but our lives tell a different story. In 1987, 80 percent of Christians felt that the roles of being a wife and a mom were valuable and important to teach to young women. In 2007, only 52 percent felt this way, with 47 percent stating that the roles of marriage and motherhood should not be emphasized to young women today. Christian women may not have burned their bras in the 1960s, but something much more precious and symbolic was burned up within us during the feminist movement: the desire to be wives and moms.

God says, “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled” (Hebrews 13:4, NKJV). I believe that God created woman to be in fellowship with man, primarily through marriage. Yes, the apostle Paul was right in saying that it is good not to marry so that you can be free to serve God. But God said it is best to be in an honorable one-man/one-woman marriage. Genesis 2:18 reads, “The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.'”

Want to pursue God’s best? Open your heart to the gift of marriage, and let Him make the call.

Excerpted from Dannah’s book, What Are You Waiting For? The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex

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  • This is a great though Dannah! However, it’s also important to remember that God’s ‘best’ for someone isn’t always to be married. Whatever God has planned for us is what’s ‘best’ for us, even if that is staying single. God bless!

  • Yes, as Megan said it isn’t always best. Each and everyone of us has a different story waiting to be told–this is why it’s important to have this discussion with God, rather than be pressured either way.

    I also think it’s important to stress that the feminist movement did some good by changing a view of marriage that wasn’t healthy. The “barefoot, pregnant, and in the kitchen” idea of a women’s role is definitely something that needed to go. Yes, its great to be a mom, just as it’s great to be a dad. It’s also incredible all the mom goes through during pregnancy (talk about the stronger of the two sexes), but that doesn’t mean she as the wife/mom is to be seen as less or forced into a stereotypical wife/mom like in old movies. Today we have stay at home dads and men that are makeup artists, hair stylists, nurses, etc. and moms that are also soldiers, scientists, police officers, etc. Men can be nurturing (and should be) just as women can provide income and be out in the workforce. Why I believe marriage was seen in this light was the cultural twists and turns that took a toll on what it was originally meant to be–a godly relationship between a man and a woman.

  • I’m confused. How can we know that God’s plan for us is to be married when we don’t know our future. If God intended for everyone to be married, wouldn’t everyone be married? What about religious leaders in the Catholic church? They’re not married, and never will be if God intended for them to be a part of the clergy. I’m not a feminist, but I’m not saying that everyone has to be married to be living the way God wants them to.

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